Some days seem like everything is going perfect.

Your energy is on point, you jump out of bed, all your prayers falls into place…

And you feel mighty.

On the other hand…

Some days feel pointless, your momentum gets slashed, and every fucking thing irritates the shit out of you.

It’s days like this when you just want to say “fuck it all” and quit.

Honestly, when I’m faced with those days… 

I accept that my life doesn’t always work right…

It frees me from expectations I can’t possibly meet, the appearance of normalcy I can’t maintain, and liberates me from the never ending cycle of endless failure.

But enough about me.

Let’s talk more about you.

When you fail… it’s easy to piss and moan about it.

That takes zero effort.

And when you do this…

It only increases the negative pull on your mind the more you try to break free.

When your life fails, it’s as though you’ve entered into an evil, alternative dimension.

And you may keep thinking…

What if you could get back to the moment right before your life was completely annihilated…

That moment right before you came home to the place you’ve faithfully paid rent and your keys won’t open the door…

That moment right before the police came knocking and want to talk to you about the papers in their hands…

That moment right before your kids stopped calling you, and now treat you like a stranger…

That moment right before everything became so fucked up…

That moment you were still thinking reasonably…

That moment you were enjoying delicious, boring normalcy.

And since most of us try to get to the end of life with fewer predispositions from our regrets, our mistakes, and our hurts…

You might as well just accept the fact that your world isn’t perfect.

And life is going to bust you in the mouth.

Repeatedly.

Relentlessly.

Unapologetically.

Leaving you exhausted.

Leaving you crying in your pillow at night.

Leaving you feeling worn and helpless.

Mentally.

Physically.

Financially.

Spiritually.

Which is why it’s your responsibility to understand which life battles will get you further fucked when fought improperly.

So here’s your personal talking-to of either the “come to Jesus” or “go to hell” variety… 

Whichever you prefer…

If you want the slightest chance of living the most productive, effective life in a world filled with chaos…

You owe it to yourself to put an immediate end to your avalanche of bullshit excuses as to why you can’t handle your shit…

So you can rise above your own self takedown.

It’s absolutely necessary you do this, here’s why:

Fucking up doesn’t mean you’re a failure…

It means you’re not doing your best with what you’ve got.

And, to do better…

You need to understand your blockade…

You think that the challenges you currently face and the fuck-ups from your past are limiting your future.

They’re not.

I know it’s hard to believe this because you’re convinced that the universe is making life 10X harder on you than everyone else. 

But guess what… this just isn’t true.

And you need to stop feeding yourself that bullshit story.

Because your situation, however difficult, does not make it the unicorn of all situations.

In fact, if you took a moment to look around at the millions of other people who are faced with the same exact obstacles as you and discover how they have made a success out of their life with less resources than you…

You would be ashamed of your lack of execution.

Here’s what you need to understand…

You don’t have limitations.

You have excuses.

You don’t have a predetermined fucked up life.

You have excuses.

Your excuses build your cage.

And you purposefully live in that cage.

(Read that sentence twice)

A cage created by imaginary “what if” thoughts and misplaced anger that’s damaging your parenting, partnerships, and leadership roles.

That’s why I strongly suggest you handle all the shit in your life that you’ve been procrastinating on sooner than later…

So that you don’t drown in the unpredictable chaos of being human; leaving you starving for hope and inspiration.

Because…

It’s easy to forget that we have a limited amount of tomorrows and sunsets.

Days become weeks.

Weeks become months.

Until you find yourself years later still saying, “I’ll make the necessary changes… tomorrow.”

If you keep putting off the things you need to do for yourself and your future success…

You’ll never get what you want out of life.

NEVER.

That’s why you need to accept that doing the work required to make your life purposefully harder is going to be difficult.

Accept that the consequences of not doing the work is just as difficult, if not more.

And the cost of NOT achieving your goals in life is extremely hard, too.

And since we’re on the subject of acceptance, here’s what else you can accept…

Accept that depression is often chronic and incurable and don’t let confusion or humiliation interfere with your determination to manage it.

Accept that there are some losses that never stop hurting and get used to living with a heavy heart.

Accept that you have weaknesses (substance abuse, sex partners, self sabotage) and start preventing these vices from turning you into a complete asshole.

Accept that you have unhealthy urges to constantly check the internet plus three experts for the answers to your challenges and, instead, start asking yourself how you can move forward knowing nothing other than what you know right now.

Accept that making progress in your life is a never ending struggle for EVERYONE… not just you… and go build a better life.

What am I saying here?

You need to give up on the false hope that a deeper understanding of what you’re facing is going to clear a path to solve your problems.

Stop seeing yourself as a failure who cannot properly begin living your life until you have found an answer that has so far eluded you thus far.

Stop diving deeper into the origins of your own fuckery…

It often brings diminishing returns and could prevent you from accepting yourself and moving forward. (Not always. But, for a lot of you it will.)

That’s why you should…

Decide for yourself whether change is necessary for you to become the kind of person you want to become.

And if you decide change is absolutely necessary…

Find good, solid reasons rooted in the fabric of your being so that you can remind yourself frequently of what those reasons are…

So when the pain, agony, frustration, humiliation, or shame surface – and they will surface – you can simultaneously embrace these kind of emotions while strengthening your position; not cling to the belief that there is no hope and spin in endless circles like a victim clown.

And you can begin by not wasting time repeating what hasn’t been working for you.

And you can stop confusing your half ass efforts to make positive changes in your life with actual dedicated, high priority goals that you have yet to chase with fury.

And when you do this…

You stop being the piss droplet in your own life…

And you start handling your shit.

And seeing life more clearly.

THIS is the antidote to the malevolence of life.

With fire and love,

Erin