Decide what’s important to your future…
If it doesn’t empower you…
If it doesn’t bring you success…
If it doesn’t make you mentally stronger…
If it doesn’t bring you peace…
Then it doesn’t belong in your life.
Period.
Cut everything else out.
Extremely.
Without hesitation.
Begin to live this way.
Begin to breathe this way.
Not just for a day or a week, but for the rest of your life.
Stop thinking you’re helpless.
You’re not.
Even if you feel like you’re living the most broken down life…
You need to dust off your courage and find your fire!
You know deep down inside (where no one else has access to) that you need to make some serious, inherent changes in life.
And I want you to know…
👉🏽 If what you are living with is causing you to destroy your own motivation…
👉🏽 If your actions or inactions are making it difficult to wake up happily…
👉🏽 If you are plagued by a sense of shame, self-betrayal, or weakness…
Allow for the possibility that you can fight back and maintain your soul – if you are willing to conceptualize yourself as someone who could, and more importantly, someone who should.
And it starts with you coming out from the shadows and hiding beneath your facade and potential.
You’re fucking your life up.
There are very few things as frustrating as the feeling of being too unmotivated or unfocused throughout the day.
Especially when it’s coupled with creating expectations for yourself or others that can’t be met and then, of course, the lies you tell yourself about why your life is spiraling out of control.
And that’s when some of you continue the never ending search for the origin of your weaker-state-of-affairs-situation.
Which often causes procrastination and serves as an excuse to wait longer until some time in the future when you think it will be easier to make inherent changes or stop behaviors completely…
…which never comes.
👉🏽 That’s why you’re unhappy.
Because you remain stuck in your own hamster wheel of trying to figure out how you got to be in your situation in the first place and searching for the “why” behind what caused you to lose the control you once had.
Moving through this process can be a giant waste of time.
But, I want you to know I get why you do this.
Whenever we’re perplexed by the weaknesses in our life that don’t make sense, we want to know why.
And the brighter and more capable we are, the more certain we are that our bad choices can represent severe failure…
Because our errors strike us emotionally.
Which, by the way, isn’t so much of a valuable insight rather than a pent-up irritation you wish you could escape from.
What I know is this:
Neurobiology teaches us that every action we take depends on neural circuitry, and all it takes is for one of those circuits to be weak or broken and our ability to function becomes compromised.
For example, if you pick up the bottle of Bourbon again after a streak of sobriety it’s not because you’re a weak person, but because alcohol triggers something in your brain that says, “I like that and I want to do it again.”
And if you go ahead and fill up the shot glass it may lead to you thinking, “As much as I hate to admit it… I guess I am, after all, a fuck up.”
Hey, I am, too.
We’ve all been there.
But, if you can tolerate the humiliation you’ll likely feel from admitting that you fuck up, it reduces the irritation from the promises you can’t keep to yourself and liberates you from the hamster wheel of feeling like a failure.
It does NOT, however, free you from setting higher standards for yourself and those around you, or implementing zero deviation discipline in your life, or admitting to the determination that you have within to be the least fucked up as possible…
…given your new self-proclaimed fuckup status and all.
So where can you go from here?
Accept the uncertainty of not necessarily being able to uncover the origin of your situation and decide which changes are necessary for you to become the kind of person you want to be.
Find motivation in that.
Dive deeply into the renewal of your principles.
Do the emotional work that makes you feel like an outsider in your own skin.
Start making yourself the object of your kindness.
Put an immediate end to the avalanche of bullshit you’ve been tolerating.
And watch new possibilities open up in front of you.
Only then will your life actually become easier.
With fire,
Erin
